Faces That Communicate
When I was waiting in line at the post office to mail a package, I saw a
two-year old girl flirting shamelessly with a handsome old man. The little girl
was standing with her mother who had a lot of packages. This little girl holding
her doll had eyes only for the 80-year-old guy with an incredibly expressive,
handsome face.
Probably our fascination with faces is inborn. It's right in the DNA. This
fascination continues throughout our lives. Old grandparents single out for
special affection good-looking grandchildren.
The character of a person is often expressed through a lively and animated
face. This is what makes a person attractive and fun to be around. Statuesque
immobile beauty is riveting too - after time, though, it becomes a little
boring.
Facial Facts
Premenopausal women usually have a softer look than men of the same age
because they have more fat on their cheeks. This deposit of fat is responsible
for the appearance of higher cheekbones.
But as women get older the changing ratio of estrogen to testosterone alters
their faces. They become more angular, less feminine.
Women's faces are not as large as men's faces: there is less bone mass. This
together with higher eyebrows makes a woman's eyes appear larger, even though in
reality they are no larger than men's eyes.
Self image
Our face not only affects the way people respond to us, it affects the way we
experience ourselves. In other words, our face defines us to the world and often
defines us to ourselves.
Even though all of the above is probably true, I think there is something
superficial about people whose sense of themselves is synonymous with the way
they look. An obsessive concern with appearance is probably a weakness.
Cosmetics advertisers take advantage of people with this weakness and sell hope
to them and make a nice profit in doing so.
A Woman's Voice
This comment is from a man's perspective. I'm sure the same would be true
about a man's voice from a woman's perspective too.
The gorgeous silent movie star that Jean Hagen plays in Singin' in the
Rain has a blood-curdling voice. Lina Lamont radiates glamour from the
silent screen but what she says and the voice she says it with are repulsive.
Maybe perfect skin and toned-up symmetrical facial muscles are not in
themselves winners. They are certainly great assets, though. But, in the end,
personality rules. Personality is revealed by the human voice.
Thoughts on Beauty
When I was a teenager I read a biography of George Bernard Shaw. (My Fair
Lady is adapted from one of his plays.) The playwright was asked to compare the
two great actresses of the day who were then appearing in London. One actress
was the gorgeous Sarah Bernhardt and the other was the less than gorgeous
Italian actress, Elenora Duse. When asked by a friend who he preferred, GBS said
that he preferred the Italian: "Her wrinkles are the credentials of her
humanity."
But not all people are as perceptive at judging a person's true worth as was
GBS. Most of us judge people, at least on first encounter, by how they look.
Research has indicated that women are no less prone to do this than men. And
this judgment based on looks does not just apply to grown-ups. A few years ago
when I was taking the train (the "L") down to the Chicago Loop, I was standing
next to a woman carrying her baby daughter in her arms. The baby could not take
her eyes off a beautiful African-American girl who was about 13 years old and
standing with her less than beautiful friends. The baby reached out and took
hold of the teenage girl's finger and would not let go of it. It was love at
first sight - based on beauty.
There is no doubt that looks count. I'm sure you've seen articles about how
people with good faces and good bodies make more money, make more friends, and
have more sex. This is obvious. What is not obvious (and not fair) is that kids
with good looks get on better even with their parents and teachers.

Does all
this mean that the less beautiful and less good-looking are lost? I hope not.
Most of us eventually find mates and get jobs that are at least tolerable. But
the really beautiful do seem to have a leg up even though physical beauty says
nothing about moral worth or depth of personality.
But then there was the Sunday matinee of Cole Porter's Anything Goes
at the high school in Hilliard, Ohio where I live. The young girl with braces on
her teeth who played the ingenue was ordinary looking. The well-bred suburban
girls of the chorus-line were world-class beauties. Yet all eyes were on this
fine teenage actress who reached out and grabbed the audience with her charm,
talent, and warmth. So are all these social scientists who do the studies on
beauty and success missing something - that intangible thing that certain people
have that lights up a room and people's hearts?
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